Dear Abby

I really need some advice here folks, I'm at my whits end and feel like I am about to boil over. Advice is appreciated. Just a heads up, it's gonna be long and whiny.

Most of you know that my Father in Law lives with us. He moved in last November after being evicted from his Tucson AZ apartment. He called and beat around the bush about the problems, and I ended up telling him to come here and stay with us. The other option was to put him out on the street, not an option at all.

We sent him some gas money and he started the drive up after putting a few belongings in storage. After settling in and transferring his job we depleted our savings account, bought airfare and all the other expenses associated with moving. Add on several huge money surprises and we were broke. Anyway- he's been here for a year.

He's been working, and paying rent with just a little nudge until we moved. He and I talked about this move before hand. We discussed that this house was quite a bit more expensive and that this rent would go up quite a bit. We discussed transferring his job locally and after some conversations and meetings with the boss he said that it would all be fine.

Except it's not.

The transfer did not go through for whatever reason. We've been here 2, nearly 3 months and he has not paid rent. He does misc work for the landlords, but has never offered to work in exchange for rent, or a credit to our rent. He offers no money, blows all his money and then has the nerve to say that he is going to buy and Xbox for himself. In the next breath he mentions that he needs gas money to get to the $8 an hour job that he managed to get. ($8 part time doesn't even come close to his rent) Add to that the $300 hole he is in at the bank because he is writing rubber checks and you can see where the frustration is coming from I assume.

So that brings me to what to do about it....

I have no freaking clue what to do about it. The stress level is astronomically high here. Things between the Hub and I don't need to take another blow for another 7 or so years. We are already arguing about how to handle this situation. We both have no idea what to do. I can't put him out on the street, gosh sometimes I want to, but as a human, I can't. There is no where else for him to go. All the other family have "reasons" they can't help him.

Because of this we are dead broke. Stressful ass dead broke and he either doesn't get it or doesn't give a shit. We are at the point where I'm going to have to go back to work, which I don't want to do. I love being an at home Mom. I shouldn't have to be the one who has to make a sacrifice....at least I don't think so. I've made enough sacrifices turning our lives upside down trying to rescue him. It should be him that gives a shit enough to make sure he doesn't run his kid into the financial grave. ugh.

So I can talk to him about it, but I have no idea how I am going to stay ahead of my pissed off mouth. It can tend to get away from me at times. So yeah, I can talk to him and vent. He'll act like a teenager, not look at me and sulk. Worst case scenario is that he gets so stressed about it that he decides to do something that scares me to death to even think about....

I just don't know what to do about him anymore. We are definately between a rock and a hard place. I need your advice!!!

I'm tired of being his 5 star hotel, but there is no where else for him to go.....

What would you do?